One Thing to do to Stop Overeating and it’s not What you Think

Years ago when I was binging, I would take the handfuls of empty candy wrappers and stuff them deep into the trash. If I could push them down far enough, maybe I could put them out of my sight and out of my mind. Unfortunately, my stomach would remind me of how much I ate. The sick and bloated feeling was too much to ignore.

This is a catastrophe. What I did was wrong. I’m going to gain weight. I need to fix this.

Fueled by worry and fear, the weight of the world on my shoulders, I would respond to such a binge like a project. The very next day I would have a plan, goals, checklists and ways to hold myself accountable.

I’ll be better. I’ll be more in control. I won’t binge again. After all, I’m working on my new weight loss project.

This was serious work. It needed a lot of my attention and energy. Because in my mind, I did something wrong and lost control, this was my way of getting it back.

Nothing else mattered.

All because of 20 Hershey Kisses.

Those Kisses took on a story of their own. By eating them, I was going to gain weight, get really fat, look pathetic and feel disgusting. (My sick, bloated belly confirmed this story.) Worse, the consumption of those 20 Kisses made me worthless and unlovable.

Many of my coaching clients have had this very same experience. Binge eating and overeating become a call to action. Bugles sounding, war flags waving overhead, they ready themselves for a grisly battle. “It’s time to make a change,” they proclaim. “I can’t take this any longer.”

But instead of regaining a sense of control, instead of getting back on the wagon, they find themselves continually binging. Hopelessness and raw fatigue set in when they realize that they’ll never, ever, EVER win the war. The rigid dieting and restrictions they worked so hard to enforce have only backfired.

What if.

What if, after overeating or binging, you didn’t beat yourself up?

What if you didn’t believe the story that the sleeve of Oreos you ate made you pathetic and worthless?

What if you didn’t feel the need to jump on the next cleanse to punish yourself for your sins?

What if you said, instead, “So what?”

What if you welcomed in some lightness around the whole experience?

Oh, I know what you’re thinking.

If you’re not beating yourself up, then you must be giving yourself permission to overeat.

If you aren’t punishing yourself, then you must be okay with treating yourself this way.

If you aren’t more disciplined, then you will never lose the weight you want to lose and worse, you will even gain weight.

This is a big leap. Beating the crap out of yourself is all you may know. But beating yourself up never creates positive action or results. Deep down, you know this to be true.

“So what” is a step toward forgiveness. “So what” is also a powerful step toward taking responsibility.

When you say, “So what,” you aren’t saying, “I don’t care.” In fact, when you say, “So what,” you care more than ever. Because you know that to move yourself forward, you need to let go of the meaning you have been making from your binge. “So what” is part of your recipe for positive momentum, and a way to pivot into something new.

Trust in love and compassion. Try it on and see if it fits. The only thing you have to lose is what is holding you back from loving yourself and your life.

Let’s stay connected! Get your free copy of 10 Habits That Will Bust You Out of a Rut here!